It feels like another life time since I last wrote actually that very well could be a true statement for what I have been through this past month. Well, here it Mondays 2 days later and I’m still writing this. So, let’s get busy.
July 30 my girlfriend Valerie took me took the ER I had excuriating pain which continued to persist regardless of what I did. I was in the ER for 5 hours X-rays a shot a morphine which did nothing for the pain. The Drs. were in such a quander I knew it was the chemo drugs too toxic for my body. I was admitted to the hospital for the next 10 days. My girlfriend Marilyn arrived while I was in the hospital. Now that was a joy in itself since we had not physically met and had known each other for over 10 years. I convinced my Dr. to I was healthy enough to be discharged after being poked and prodded though various tests. I just wanted to go home. Marilyn and I spent the next two days hanging out and having fun even though my energy level was extremely low. I continued to go down hill on the day she left which was Wednesday and slowing began moving out of my body I was in so much pain the pain killers were even doing the trick anymore. My sister Juliann stayed with me Wednesday night as I refused to go back to the hospital it didn’t make sense to me since I was seeing my Dr. in the morning.
Cancer has nothing on Me
Well, everything after that became such a blur even being admitted into to the hospital on August 13th. My body was so dehydrated and I was very close to crossing over enough of this stuff show me something different. Once again the Dr.s were at there witts end trying to figure out the problem. My main Dr. D. who I trust completely agreed with me it was due to the chemo drugs and no more of the clinical study stuff. I had GI scope 2 CT scans a colonascopy samples were being taken on the hour as well as 6 bags running through me intervinously.
Still talking with the hands hmmmm
WOW what the heck was going on as I lay in bed feeling not feeling, knowing deep down all of this was caused by the chemo drug I was on X-eloda heavy duty poison experimental drug.
Saturday the Doc wanted to order a blood tranfusion, yikes this was big stuff for me. It took me close to 8 hours to be 100% clear this was for me even everyone else wanted me to get it done now a matter of life or death situation here. Hmmmm not sure if I was feeeelin it.
My people really showed up for me and there was so much love felt and shared with my family even though our differences. My sister Susan arrived Friday, my sister Mary and her son Zach arrived on Saturday afternoon and my younger brother Andy drove all night from Vegas just to spend 8 hrs with me it rocked. This was beginning of great healing.
I have pics that I will put up at a later date once I get them from my people. I was discharged last Tuesday evening feeling much more confident this time about going home. It has been a journey back and I feeling much better these days. it is one moment at time very humbling since my body is now operating at 45% which is much better than 40% on Friday.
Everything stoppped in my life so if you have not heard from me this past month this is the reason. The support and love has been tremdrous thank you all so much.
I am hoping my hands will be better this week to paint they got pretty bad this past month its all part. My body God Bless even though it looks and feels totally different I honor it and thank it for coming through.
Things are looking up I drove my car for the first time since the end of July on Saturday, my gate has improved and I even took a walk in Momument Park yesterday of course with my walking stick. Things just don’t matter as they use too its almost like living in two different worlds.
Saint Germain showed up last night again in my living room and I asked to help me what is this all about let go he said and forgive. I said show me how to truly let go to feel it and be it.
So all is well I still expect so much from myself like being 100% up too par it lessening by the moment as being wellness is the most important thing on the agenda today sorry twitter you are just going to have wait for another day its not important.
Smiles and Peace
Lisa
Resources:
www.lindamackenzie.net/BCbodyarticle.htm
http://www.essiacinfo.org/
http://www.happytailsrescue.com/Herbs2.html
www.satiama.com
www.molliesummerland.com
www.americancancersociety.org
www.senseofsecurity.org
www.NaturalLikeUs.com
Your Primal Nature CD by Caroline Myss
Rituals of Healing (using imagery for health and wellnes) by Jeanne Achterberg Ph.D Barbara Dossey, RN,MS,FAAN, Leslie Kolkmeir RN MEd
The Journey by Brandon Bays
http://www.lindamackenzie.net/BCbodyarticle.htm
http://katherineche.com/default.aspx
http://strandsmedicalwigs.com
Breast Cancer Specialists at Memorial Hospital
